Valentine's Day

So . . . about Valentines Day. I have mixed feelings.

There are so many people who have negative feelings about it (and strong ones at that) and feel bitter and cynical; they are, of course, the single ones. You know who I'm talking about, the ones who refer to it as "Single Awareness Day" and buy themselves chocolate, close the blinds, and watch sappy movies all day (or their own personal version of this pity party). I understand this to an extent, sometimes being single isn't really a situation by choice, it's not always fun, and in Provo, Utah it's not "socially acceptable". Everyone is always asking if you're dating someone, if you're interested in someone, if you want to be set up, etc. There is an emphasis on your lack of a significant other and how you should probably be getting one. So on a holiday dedicated to celebrating the other person in your life, you don't really get to celebrate and it could feel like you've missed the bus.

However, I've tried to have a positive attitude, regardless of my dating situation. I've never had a "Valentine" per say, but it's ok, I'll have one someday! (wow, that rhymed) I try to think of it like Hanukkah, it's just a holiday I don't celebrate, but it's ok if other people do. (However, unlike Valentine's Day, I probably won't become a Jew to celebrate, but hey-it's not a bad analogy, right dad?) Some of my friends were talking about how pointless it is to have this holiday and when they are married, their husbands shouldn't need a holiday to tell them how much they love them. Ok, valid-ish point. But not really. I don't know what marriage is like and I don't pretend to, but from what I understand, it's a two-way street. If the hubby is expected to treat everyday like Valentine's Day, doesn't that mean the wife-y is too? That seems like an awful lot of effort. The cards, the treats, the special little favors-it's a lot! I think it's nice that we have a holiday dedicated only to love. And everyday doesn't have to be Valentine's Day, but it's the little things we do that show the people around us we love them. It's unloading the dishwasher, making the bed, keeping them in your prayers and knowing their concerns, a phone call, cutting out a newspaper article because you know they would like it, it's those things that we should be doing everyday to show love, not an extravagant holiday bursting with pink, red, and little naked men with bows and arrows. Anyways, back to the point, I think Valentine's Day is a really good idea. There is a really positive message behind the holiday-love. What better thing to celebrate? It's what keeps people happy, keeps families together, something we say at the end of a phone call or when we're walking out the door, it's what we want someone to remember if there is a chance we don't see them again, the reason we work on relationships even when we've been wronged or hurt before, why we forgive, why the Savior sacrificed His life, it's a completely perfect thing to celebrate! According to C.S. Lewis . . .

"Charity means 'Love, in the Christian sense'. But love, in the Christian sense, does not mean an emotion. It is a state not of the feelings but of the will; that state of the will which we have naturally about ourselves, and must learn to have about other people ."

Loving someone isn't about whether or not you like them. It's about wanting good for them, hoping the best for them, and looking out for them. He's saying that if you detach the emotion from the word "love", you're still left with the actions that communicate it. You treat them with respect, you only say good things about them, when there is a miscommunication you apologize, you keep their secrets, you trust them-all these things are communicated by one little word, love. So I think it's ok to have one day a year when we celebrate this, when we are reminded of why we love them and we show them, and the rest of the world sometimes, that we love them.

I think that's a really good reason to celebrate, even if it does make people lovey dovey and cause some to dress in clashing colors. Besides, it makes a lot more sense than a few other holidays we celebrate-St. Patrick's Day? I have no idea what pinching people and making green pancakes is all about, but whatever. And Halloween? Don't get me started on Halloween.